~SPM result~

27 / 3 / 2010. 11.54AM.

         Wow, on the SPM examination days, I didn't got what I wanted.. Well, it's real disappointing furthermore I heard this sopo got straight A's..zz..Well I'm happy for her, but i'm gek sam in myself..Yea, I didn't get my results.. What I got is 2A 1A- 2B+ 2B 1C+ 1C... Hey, my results just almost the same with you..and mine is bit worser than you.. You think I don't have pressure on it? my family..My study..In the ns time I already have a VERY long thoughts of wanna continue study or not...EVEN before the results came out..I just ignored the results for a while..and i think,..Should or shouldn't i to continue to further study? Cause my parents keep encouraging me to straight go for my family business.. and i'm already laid a pressure by them on my shoulder.. it's okay, cause i'm the one to decide my future..They just kind of 'disturber', sorry no offence. something like a disturber sent by god itself.. and in the ns period, i've decided to straight work, regardless of what my results would be... Yeah, this decision is tough cause i'll need to face the real adult world, full of corruption and other things.. well, you can say that i don't values the results i've got, but in fact i really do gek sam..Why my trial exam i got 5A's and in real SPM examination I got worser? shouldn't it be better than trial results? cause trial exam are harder than SPM exam..Why?

            To ni. I know you know whom I subjected to. I really frustrated when i read your blog saying those comments in your fb is all nonsense... Hey, if really nonsense, why would i waste my time and cracking my brain? at the time after i read your notes in fb, to be frank i have a sincere feeling to 'tam' you, regardless it's NONSENSE for you..I didn't even thought of that you'll say that my comments are all nonsense..Yeah i admit i terasa,.. Cause i'm the only one who wrote the longest comment in your note..I REALLY Frustrated when you treat me AS NOT A FRIEND but a kind of STUPID people wanders on your profile and leaving stupid idiots comments.... did you ever feel what i felt? did you ever think there is people who got worser than you in SPM results whom wish to strives higher? Did you think i didn't put all my hard works for my SPM? If i didn't, what for I went for tuition wasting my money and time, went for many many group studies wasting my time and also money, what for i go to school to learn something? I know that you're really sad and couldn't think a better way..But do you know that my bro and sis only got an A and 2 A for SPM respectively? And now do you know how much they achieved? They didn't give up as you do..Cause they take this as a CHALLENGE for them. What about you? Yeah, getting straight A's or 7A above have many benefits... In a sense that family will happy for you, able to get scholarships or even sponsorship, easier to get in college and what's more? I'm frustrated.

           And now i've decide to take business course, finance and investment which is a last minute change of plan..And ni, i really hates that when you didn't value our friendship..Maybe i'm the one whom doesn't value yours first, and here i'm sorry. You'll sure won't accept my apology, but as friend of yours, i'm sorry on what i've done to you that you thought it's bad for you... And yeah, being pessimistic all the time would poison your body ni.. Can't everyone stay focus on what's good in themselves? why must us compare to each other like it's a must to do? (*)Why must we matters so much as other people's saying and thoughts? yea i still could not let go the point ;(*)...but i'm trying my best to change...to become a better one..for my family, and myself... Well , calm down.